Well friends, let's talk about me for a minute :) By now you know that to share with you some of the lessons I've learned, I'm going to have to share a lot of myself with you. Some of this is embarrassing, but I'm happy to do it because I know you're reading this and that you realize now that you're not alone. So here we go....
For the past two years, I have been obsessed with my scale. By "obsessed", I mean that I weighed myself every single morning. If my weight had increased from the day before, I agonized over what I had eaten over the past 24 hours, and what I should not eat that day. If my weight had decreased, I tried to remember what I did right the day before so I could repeat it again. I ignored factors like (*cringe*) certain times of the month where bloating might be more likely, and other factors that may have accounted for the weight increase or decrease. I lived completely by the scale.
I started this practice at 214 lbs., and within about a year I had lost 20 lbs. And then, the worst thing ever happened--I hit a plateau. I continuously drifted between 193-197 lbs., size 10-12, and I tell you, every single day I agonized over where in that range I was, and why I couldn't just get down below 190. I had a breakdown.
And then, my dear Jeff (you'll be hearing about him a lot, I'm sure), talked me off the ledge, so to speak. I put my scale in the back of my closet, and it's been there for a few weeks so far. I thought I would feel some sort of separation anxiety, but I have never felt better in my life.
Instead of chasing a number, my health and fitness is focused on how I feel inside. I am practicing forming good eating habits, and drinking water and taking vitamins regularly. I have an exercise "routine", of sorts, which alternates running and biking, and sprinkles some weight-training throughout. I do yoga almost daily.
But most importantly, I listen to my body. Ladies, we will talk very soon about the importance of listening to your body and your instincts, but this applies to men and women. Do not peel yourself out of bed at 3 a.m. when you have only gotten 2 hours of sleep because you just have to lose that last three pounds. Your body needs rest. Do not get me wrong, you will feel a very clear buzz of energy after you go to the gym, but I can assure you that it will not carry you through the day and help your brain stay alert when you're at work at 2 p.m. wishing there was a cot under your desk. Listen to what your body is telling you. I'm tired, let's get some rest. I'm thirsty, I need water. It's talking, just listen!
I do not want you to take away from this posting that weight is not important, and we should all just float through life eating donuts and sitting on our personal lily pad. I am merely suggesting that your quest should be for health, and that you should do it because you love yourself, and in a way that honors that love and respects where your body is today.
You can do it. I know you can.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
love your body (or, everything from the inside out)
My house is filled with books about all types of things, but I want to share some of my yoga books with you. I'll try to always give you a link so that you can buy the book and read it too.
I have been practicing at Desert Song Yoga for almost two years now, and I absolutely adore it there! As I've been studying with Meg Byerlein, who is a certified Anusara yoga instructor. (As a very important aside, and as a very, very short summary, Anusara yoga is a style of hatha yoga that was created by John Friend in 1997. I couldn't possibly capture all of how beautiful it is in this one posting alone, but I can say that what I love most about it is that it emphasizes the importance of heart-opening and intrinsic goodness. I invite you to learn more about Anusara yoga by going here.)
Now, back to us :) I, too, want to become a certified Anusara yoga instructor. I am excited to devote the years and years of practice that I am sure I will need before I am ready to do that, but in the meantime, I am trying to absorb all that I can about the teachings and the practice so that I can fully appreciate what I hope to one day be teaching others. One of the requirements for Anusara certification is the completion of a reading list. There are soooooooo many amazing books on there! There are only a few that are required, but there are dozens that are recommended, and I want to make it through the whole list!
So, all of that is a lead-up to telling you that this weekend, I finished a book called Yoga from the Inside Out by Christina Sell, which was on my reading list! This book covers a subject near and dear to my heart: learning to have a healthy body image. This was a pretty quick, but very inspiring read. The general idea is this, I think: It is good to aspire to be physically healthy. There are numerous health reasons for wanting to minimize body fat, to eat well, and to exercise. BUT it is also important to love and honor yourself right where you are this minute, understanding that life is a process, but that you are perfect as you are right now.
This is absolutely beautiful. And critical.
Instead of giving you an abstract example, I'll talk about myself. I am currently about 5'11", 195 lbs. I would like to lose about 30-40 lbs. but that is its own process. So, this book would instruct that instead of beating myself up about how much I need to lose, or what jiggles when I walk, or why I shouldn't have eaten that cheeseburger last night, etc., I need to love myself just as I am. Only through that self-love and acceptance--instead of hating or resisting what is--will I be able to make any changes in myself.
Guess what? That's hard for me.
I know that I am naturally hard-headed, so it's difficult for me to just breathe into this minute and know that this one is the only one I can control. It's 8:32 p.m. now. That means everything I did from 8:31 p.m. and back is already finished. It doesn't belong to me anymore! 8:33 p.m. doesn't really belong to me either because we're not there yet, and it's not promised to me. But I can control right now. I can decide that I'm going to spend this moment reading or writing something positive, drinking water, meditating, or....doing yoga.
I think what I loved about this book the most was that Christina Sell (in addition to, somehow, knowing everything about me and everything I have ever struggled with) really captured what has continued to make yoga such a blessing to me. When you are practicing yoga, and I mean really practicing, with your whole mind, body, and heart in it, you don't have time to criticize yourself. I am still a mental busy-body, but there have definitely been times where I have been 100% focused on what's happening on my mat. During those times, I don't have time to think about what went wrong at work, or what I'm going to eat for dinner, or whether I'll have enough energy to go to the gym in the morning.
The practice of yoga can, if you let it, be a way to appreciate your body in a new light. Maybe all you can do right now is Tadasana. But be blessed that you have two legs that are strong enough to support you. Look down at your feet, and plant all four corners of each foot firmly into the earth. Draw your knees up towards your thighs, and feel the energy surging through your legs. I promise, before long you won't see stretch marks or cellulite. You'll see the powerful grace of your body, and that will be beautiful to you.
It is beautiful. You are beautiful.
I have been practicing at Desert Song Yoga for almost two years now, and I absolutely adore it there! As I've been studying with Meg Byerlein, who is a certified Anusara yoga instructor. (As a very important aside, and as a very, very short summary, Anusara yoga is a style of hatha yoga that was created by John Friend in 1997. I couldn't possibly capture all of how beautiful it is in this one posting alone, but I can say that what I love most about it is that it emphasizes the importance of heart-opening and intrinsic goodness. I invite you to learn more about Anusara yoga by going here.)
Now, back to us :) I, too, want to become a certified Anusara yoga instructor. I am excited to devote the years and years of practice that I am sure I will need before I am ready to do that, but in the meantime, I am trying to absorb all that I can about the teachings and the practice so that I can fully appreciate what I hope to one day be teaching others. One of the requirements for Anusara certification is the completion of a reading list. There are soooooooo many amazing books on there! There are only a few that are required, but there are dozens that are recommended, and I want to make it through the whole list!
So, all of that is a lead-up to telling you that this weekend, I finished a book called Yoga from the Inside Out by Christina Sell, which was on my reading list! This book covers a subject near and dear to my heart: learning to have a healthy body image. This was a pretty quick, but very inspiring read. The general idea is this, I think: It is good to aspire to be physically healthy. There are numerous health reasons for wanting to minimize body fat, to eat well, and to exercise. BUT it is also important to love and honor yourself right where you are this minute, understanding that life is a process, but that you are perfect as you are right now.
This is absolutely beautiful. And critical.
Instead of giving you an abstract example, I'll talk about myself. I am currently about 5'11", 195 lbs. I would like to lose about 30-40 lbs. but that is its own process. So, this book would instruct that instead of beating myself up about how much I need to lose, or what jiggles when I walk, or why I shouldn't have eaten that cheeseburger last night, etc., I need to love myself just as I am. Only through that self-love and acceptance--instead of hating or resisting what is--will I be able to make any changes in myself.Guess what? That's hard for me.
I know that I am naturally hard-headed, so it's difficult for me to just breathe into this minute and know that this one is the only one I can control. It's 8:32 p.m. now. That means everything I did from 8:31 p.m. and back is already finished. It doesn't belong to me anymore! 8:33 p.m. doesn't really belong to me either because we're not there yet, and it's not promised to me. But I can control right now. I can decide that I'm going to spend this moment reading or writing something positive, drinking water, meditating, or....doing yoga.
I think what I loved about this book the most was that Christina Sell (in addition to, somehow, knowing everything about me and everything I have ever struggled with) really captured what has continued to make yoga such a blessing to me. When you are practicing yoga, and I mean really practicing, with your whole mind, body, and heart in it, you don't have time to criticize yourself. I am still a mental busy-body, but there have definitely been times where I have been 100% focused on what's happening on my mat. During those times, I don't have time to think about what went wrong at work, or what I'm going to eat for dinner, or whether I'll have enough energy to go to the gym in the morning.
The practice of yoga can, if you let it, be a way to appreciate your body in a new light. Maybe all you can do right now is Tadasana. But be blessed that you have two legs that are strong enough to support you. Look down at your feet, and plant all four corners of each foot firmly into the earth. Draw your knees up towards your thighs, and feel the energy surging through your legs. I promise, before long you won't see stretch marks or cellulite. You'll see the powerful grace of your body, and that will be beautiful to you.
It is beautiful. You are beautiful.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
at the beginning...
...there was a blank blog page, and a million thoughts swimming around my head! And that's why I started this blog!
Anyone who knows me knows that I love four things: God, Jeff, cheeseburgers, and YOGA! Maybe in that order :) I'm sure all of those will come up in this blog, but its main focus is yoga.
I've been practicing yoga since December 2008, but over the past few months I've become more committed to my goal of soon becoming a yoga instructor. There is so much information out there, so much to read, so much to absorb! I'm so excited to share my journey with you; I hope that we can learn together.
Anyone who knows me knows that I love four things: God, Jeff, cheeseburgers, and YOGA! Maybe in that order :) I'm sure all of those will come up in this blog, but its main focus is yoga.
I've been practicing yoga since December 2008, but over the past few months I've become more committed to my goal of soon becoming a yoga instructor. There is so much information out there, so much to read, so much to absorb! I'm so excited to share my journey with you; I hope that we can learn together.
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